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And then this cycle will continue until you lose confidence completely in your own ability to take decisions.

It’s crucial for you, your parents and your significant other that you have absolute clarity about what you want.

It’s like trying to pen down the pros and cons of being racist against blacks.

So I’ve decided to help people in intercaste relationships convince their parents of their decisions. Prepare yourself before you go in for The Discussion.

As someone that’s lived through this scenario, I’ll start out by saying that you’re missing the point. Perhaps your girlfriend suddenly added a password to her phone.

Perhaps she’s been spending time with friends more often, or is being secretive and vague when you ask her questions. Your girlfriend goes to the bathroom, your eyes laser beam over to her cell phone, and before you know it, you’re scrolling through her text messages, looking for a reason you feel a knife twisting in your gut every time she says she’s going out with friends.

Why do you need proof that cheating is occurring to acknowledge that you don’t feel safe in the relationship?

Stop trying to control the situation and start taking responsibility for what you can control: YOU.

Use your preparation to talk the matter through with them at this point.

Take time to research as many examples as possible of happy intercaste couples and unhappy same-caste couples among your friends and acquaintances.

For all of you that have already checked the cell phone, and that stumbled upon some suspicious text messages or phone calls, I gently say to you wake up. Figure out what’s really going on, and if that twisting feeling won’t go away do not ignore it.

I’m not saying to approach your partner with boxing gloves on, ready to fight.

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